Hinding in a Dustbin

Well a day has passed and not much has happened since the last time i did an entry, except for the fact that my cd player keeps dieing. damn bastards. Theres so much i want to say here but im too afraid to (Score one for being afraid of judgement). so yeah im way too afraid to say what i want to which is a big thing for me to do considering i hate admiting im frightened. Which is why im not going to say here what i want to say untill i gather up enough courage through the drinking of alcohol in which case i wont be able to type properly anyway because ill be so damn unco.... yes even more than normal and hey, ill even start talking in 3rd person again just for you like i always do when i get wasted.

Ok well im bored totally now, so i shall say good night *bows*
Shaddowdove

Bribery and Corruption

Well today has been a most interesting day. I have been told to suck poo by Tara, i have seen 2 kiddies at Kindy who were going canbalistic over their 'Baby', it was a doll but still they wanted to EAT IT. Speaking of food im hungry, & despite what Mrah'Sponagi says i am NOT, i repeat NOT made out of chocolate sponge cake though it would explain y i love chocolate so much.... i have had the strangest urge lately to listen to anything by Dido, which is really creepy by i seem to like her songs :S i might have to pick up a cd by her really cheap somewhere and listen to it 10 times and get over it and donate it to kindy for a Rest time cd. hmm sounds like a plan. But when can i get to the shops? Friday maybe i think i finish early so i can go then and meet up with Rhyan and Andy and the others as well....hmmmmsounds good to me :D now i just have to organise it. Damn i suck at organising things, it requires coordindation and an understanding of time, which i sadly lack. Well that and the fact that I am just lazy. And have no motivation to do much except for recently.... gee dont know y that is *winks and giggles* speaking of motivation i also have to motivation to do some ...different shopping to what i normally do. Pity i have no spare time really. *Shakes fist at the world* its so damn pissy. I only get to see my friends once a week, and my boyfriend twice... so wishing i was back in school right now, then i could see everyone everyday have plenty of money without having to work, not rent to pay. Life was so damn simple. No matter what anyone tells you, ignoreance is bliss. Great now im in a shitty mood *sigh*. i miss everyone so badly right now. I feel so alone sitting here in the dark in front of the computer. But what can i do? nothing. i can do nothing unless i ran all the way to paradice point and throw myself in the arms of my boyfriend.... who might actually be at his dads place instead which would be bad. Or i could go to Jazzy, Matty or Andrea's house.... Meh the effort. Fuck this shit. Im going away to write a story about a girl named Thorn, well at least start one. No garruntee that im actually going to finish it though. Would you like a little teaser? YES the silence screams back at me. Awesome here we go....
...
My first memory was one of being alone. I was about ten years old and I was walking down a long dirt road. I don’t know where I was going or why. I was just walking, half tripping on the stones buried beneath the snow, ripping the souls of my feet to shreds with out realising it. I don’t know how long I was walking, time had lost all meaning to me. Day. Night. It never mattered because still I walked on. People passed me by without a glance, dismissing me as another street waif as I walked on and on.

I remember the snow rising up to my knees as I struggled to keep walking even though the road had been closed for the winter. Suddenly my foot caught on a tree root and I stumbled forward and off the side of the road into a ditch. My legs and arms flung out in every direction as I frantically fought to stop sliding down the banks slope. I finally landed at the bottom, my fall cushioned by a slurry of half melted snow and mud. It was there, in that cold embrace, that I finally gave up walking and let my weary limbs rest and slipped off into the blissful darkness of sleep....

How was that? sounded half decent? i dont really care either way.

Shaddowdove

P.S Dont worry i occasionally get this way sometimes i have to stop reading and listening to depressing things.

My sweet vampiric Rose... watch out it bites

Well i have returned yet again to annoy and confuse those who mistakenly read this page.

The past few days have been relly hectic and tiring for me. worked 9-5 for 3 days then did a massive 8-645 day. totally screwed me over. Then made it worse by going out to the movies with my mates and didnt get home untill 2 am. I was beyond tired. I was exhausted. yes people there is a difference. if im tired, im sleepy. If im exhausted i am so tired that i go hyper and do stupid things like jumping in every puddle i see and start doing sexy danceing in the lobby of the movie theater. i would also like to add at this point that the majority of my friends suck cos they didnt come to the movies. Only 2 people came and im really bummed out about it. So now u all suck, yes even YOU who actually had a legit reason not to come. And Jazzy sucks even more cos she gave me the wrong addy for her blog site and i had to get it off Mrah'Sponagi. For those of you who are interested its...

http://dimplebum.blogspot.com/

and its an awesome site and full of the random goodness that we all love and crave so much. My other friend (yes it seems like a have alot but i dont really) has just started a blog site as well for her story which is based on REAL people. No im not saying that im really a witch and that zombies and vampires and evles are real and walking around and just happen to be my best friends. But the.... oh what the hell... u know what im talking about. Just read the damn thing cos its awesome. Heres the site B4 i forget....

www.darkangelrelm.blogspot.com

what else happened? *thinks* well Rhyan was supposed to pick me up today at 1030 but was late (for some reasons which im too lazy to type here) which was ok considering i didnt actually wake up untill 1015. So yes rhyan ITS OK that u were late, its actually damn good timing if u ask me. Plus i FINALLY saw Interview with a Vampire on DVD and the book was heaps better...what other movies did i see.... i cant remember now. But i found out that despite the fact ive never played ping pong seriously b4 im actually pretty good at it. I would like to say that i kicked Rhyan's ass at it but i cant or i would be MASSIVELY lying. I seemed to hit all the really difficult shots well but messed up the easy ones. See i TOLD you people there IS something WRONG with me. I am a NUT JOB and damn proud of it & to that guy on MSN who thought my name was 'Ali' youre a fucking wanker and yes im proud of being a mental case.

And Andrea youre a crazy nut to for staying a wake for so long.ummm what else.....?
oh yeah Queen of the Damned soundtrack & the Used ROCK MY WORLD!!!!! There it has been said. jeez its almost midnight and im surprised that im still awake.... or maybe not considering the 4 or 5 cans of coke ive had. I mean coke the drink, not coke the drug. Cos drugs suck unless its panadol,codine,cough syprip, or cold and flu tablets. Or a multi vitamin all of which i need to survive on a daily basis. ha ha ha.... wait, thats bad. *shrugs* o well no ones perfect. talk 2 u all later!

Shaddowdove

Of Loving and Childish things

Well i have returned! Bwah ha ha ha ha.
Ive worked all day and im completely buggered cos i got no sleep last night. The little kids drove me insane today with all thier screaming and squealing and never ending noise. But then again loosing my sanity today wasnt such a big deal considering i lost it so long ago anyway.

RAHHHHH cant wait until tomorro its my day off YAY and im going to see Rhyan again! WHOOOOO!!!! talking to everyone at once :S its taken me 15 minutes to just write this... damn.... have to go soon as well. crap.

My God is there ever and end to the pissyness of it all?
mum just got the shits cos im not watching tv with her....oh well....AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH she just threw a paddlepop ice cream at me....mmm chocolate....

Oh wait chocolate is an aphrodesiac (or however u spell it) thats bad at the moment... very very bad.....ok ill sign off now b4 i say some thing i KNOW im going to regret....

Shaddowdove

Poo Coloured Mucus

Well i have returned after a very eventful weekend. I went o dreamworld. I went on the Claw!!! it was so much fun...i also went on the Giant Drop, that scared the crap out of me (thankyou Rhyan, for saying that ur harness was loose just before we dropped it really made me feel better about the ride *rolls eyes*).

Poor Andy got sick :( but shes feeling much better now thank goodness. Ok summerising the day, we did someold time fotos which were awesome and i need to get a copy of one of them off my friend cos of the sexy-ness of everyone in it (yes even u Jazz-a-mat-azz, u sexy beast u). i'll probably put it up online once i get around to it, but u know me im a lazy bitch.

What else happened? ummmm yeah went to friends house after dreamworld. we watched a copy of that movie....ummmm Over the hedge, it hasnt come out in Auzzie yet but it Awesome. funny as. but i was tired and fell asleep thankgod noone drew anything in perminent marker on my face (u guys rock). & we found out that i cant hold a tune to save my life after we played SingStar and i lost....every...single...time. ha ha o well it was fun anyway.

Im supposed to be studying for my cert 3, now but i couldnt be bothered instead im talking to friends on msn and putting music on my computer from cds. yay. *laughs*

Oh yes and before i go thanks to Mrah'Sponagi for the name of this post. And NO i wasnt eating poo coloured mucus but rather Yogo, which ive had a really strange urge for lately. Thanks Hannah for agreeing with me that yogo ISNT poo coloured mucus. The People rule the world for eturnity!

Shaddowdove

Of cold and freezeing things

Well a nights gone by and im once again bored. Im crashing at my friends house and im going to conquer her lounge room with the power of my lightsaber. Its cold and Andy has abandoned me to watch the news. *listens to the news* ha ha ha Britney Spears is a bad mother. Like we didnt know that before it was on the news. Andy has the best Orange Juice EVER so im going to be drinking it all night. Screw the alcohol bring on the oj.

Going to meet my friends at Dream World tomorro. My bf's going to be there YAY havent seen him in ages. Mrah'Sponagi cant come *sad face* wish he could but he has lots of study to do. Ditched work today, didnt feel like caring for the little Runty's.

Well id better go so i can steal more of Andy's oj mmmmmmmmmmmmm oj-licious. (this is in no way related to O.J Simpson).

Untill tomorro,
Shaddowdove

P.S Mrah'Sponagi loves..... damn it im sworn to secrecy.... i hope ur happy now Mrah'Sponagi
p.p.S Andy loves Rosie
p.p.p.s Shaddowdove loves Rhyan
p.p.p.p.s Andy is my lesbian lover. OOoooooohhhh love triangle.
p.p.p.p.p.s Rosie loves Rhyan too OMG its a love SQUARE
p.p.p.p.p.p.s Andy loves her ancient flame (no, really he's THAT old).

Druid of Darkness

The nights passing on and im bored out of my brain. I consulted with MrahS'ponagi earlier and i recant my previous statement, i am not a looser, but rather a Druid of Darkness. Im not sure what this really entails but im quite sure it doesnt envolve me dancing around a fire at night during the full moon. Although that would be fun as long as i wasnt naked like they normally are in the old pagan rituals.

Ok lets move along to another topic before i start blabbering on about me being naked which is really bad, might i add, though my boyfriend wouldnt think so... but once again i have taken several steps past the line of 'Dont Go There'. I seem to be doing that on a regular basis. Even the people i work with agree that im one of the strangest people they've ever met & trust me, we meet ALL sorts of people.

Mmmm i'd like to say that i am so tired that i think that i'll just let the kiddies run rampant tomorrow even though someone from the department of Communities is coming to check that we are following all proper rules and regulations. Woo i can get my childcare place shut down... wait thats bad. no childcare place > no job > no qualifications > no MONEY. NOOOOO!!!!!!!! must have money!! who says i dont understand the consiquences to my actions. All you have to factor in is money and chocolate cookies and i'll understand it perfectly. Have i ranted and raved enough for one night?

Hmm i can here the overwhelming silence which i choose to interprite as a YES, so now i'll go and rant and rave else where.

~ Shaddowdove

P.S Mrah'Sponagi says 'uh'.

Well then

Well i started this so i can write like an online journal (no shit really?) but i have no idea how long its going to last but then again shit happens. Lots of crap happends in my life ranging from boy friends, friends,excuses ("I was playing a game to try to get my epic staff for my priest" yup thanks Mrah'Sponagi)& little runty kids, who are in no way connected to the boy friend part. Well not exactly but i'll get to that later. umm what else? oh yeah I generally go by the name of Shaddowdove because it suits me better than the name my mother gave me. I mean seriously, she named me after a plant of all things & one that doesnt smell or look good anyway. I'm Obsessed with reading (with a capital 'o') and im currently reading the Anita Blake series by Laurell K. Hamilton, the Vampire Cronicles by Anne Rice, and The Circle of Nine trillogy by Josephine Pennicott. Told you i read alot.

My world is a confusing combination of fact and fiction which makes life difficult for me and everyone else. Not to mention the fact i feel like im loosing my mind half the time. Which really doesnt help when i work with children all day. Great, a delusional person is looking after your children at daycare. Now isnt ur faith restored in the child protecion system?

Music is also another big passion of mine. I'll listen to just about anything as long as it isnt like 20 years old, isnt country western or too hip hoppy. See im even willing to listen to preppy music. Scary huh? Ahhhhhhh im sure i could find some more crap to blabber on about but i'd better be going, one of my fave tv shows will be starting soon and i dont want to miss it. I am such a looser. ha ha ha.

Later guys,
Shaddowdove

P.S for those who are interested visit my site shaddowdove.blogspot.com or www.quizilla.com/users/shaddowdove/quizzes/ for my stories and poems that i spontainiously write.